It’ll be over all too soon … just three more shows until the finale! Seems like a good point to reflect on some of the Star wisdom I’ve gained in the last seven weeks:
(Can’t remember who did or said what? Click the links to see who gets credit.)

1 – Being a Star judge is no cake walk.
2 – Simply saying “I love butter” at the end of a presentation won’t win you a camera challenge.
3 – Even in a TV food competition, shushing or interrupting someone is still bad manners.
4 – Wearing crazy oversized sunglasses on camera doesn’t buy much in the way of credibility.
5 – Bobby Flay has a serious tie collection.
6 – Singing for the judges only works if you’re on a show where that’s the thing.
7 – Some foods — like say, beef stroganoff — just need to stay on the not-so-healthy list. (Comfort food should be, umm … comforting.)
8 – Chorizo taquitos aren’t the way to go when planning a kids’ birthday menu.
9 – The Frank Sinatra house is no place for talk of budget-friendly meals.
10 – Bob Tuschman could make the world’s worst insult sound completely pleasant and courteous.

So how about you? What Star lessons have you learned?

My first love was Dzintra, but as with all great love stories – ours was cut short far too early. After the enviable Dzenis-Dudley romance of 2010 ended, I knew I must move on and find my next reality star romance. Serena and Brianna both fit the bill perfectly. But, who would I choose? To love one meant I would have to hurt another. I’d been left so heartbroken before, I couldn’t stand to hurt one of them like that. Oh, how I’ve been conflicted!

Serena and Brianna have made the decision-making process very difficult. In my reality (yes, it’s a bit skewed), both have been competing for my affections. Serena with her unintentional comedic timing, Brianna with her diva-esque quality – both have been screaming, “Choose me! Choose me!” It has been embarrassing, actually. When the ladies argued a couple of episodes back, I knew that I was at the root of the tension. I hate it when ladies fight over me.

This sordid love triangle brings me to last night’s episode. Again, watching the two of them cook at Frank Sinatra’s house to win me over – or the judges, whatever – was difficult to watch. Even though Brianna was very hard on tuna casserole (a fave meal of mine), I knew the tuna hostility was really misplaced anger – she wanted my decision, and she wanted it NOW.

As Herb, Aarti and Brianna were left standing in front of the judges – one of them about to be eliminated – I finally made my decision. As I watched Brianna in her blue dress bravely stand before the panel, I knew she was the girl for me. The thought of losing her was terrifying! I couldn’t withstand that kind of pain. And once she survived this elimination, she and I would move forward with our relationship. She would forgive me for having been so confused for so long and Serena? Well, she would come to understand that cupid’s arrow had struck – and once that little dude strikes, he can’t be stopped.

And then, it happened. They sent my girl home! Can you EVEN? I threw my shoe at the TV! How dare Bob, Bobby and Susie, yet again, come between me and love?! It’s like they have a personal vendetta against me and are determined to have me die alone. Bobby, if you’re reading this, can’t you help a brother?! When did you turn on me?

Brianna, my love, I must let you go. I will always carry you (and Dzintra) with me.

Serena, you lucky girl – I’m all yours! Honestly, now that I sit and reflect, it has been you all along. Seriously.

This week on The Next Food Network Star, Bobby gets – well, let’s just say he’s not all about a few of the finalists’ offerings.

How would you caption this pic of Bobby?

Good company: Bobby, Jonathan Waxman, Susan Feniger and Eric Greenspan

Think about the best thing you ever ate and how you’d make it again. Now think about someone else’s fondest food memory and cook it, recapturing their happiness. Then make the dish the pick of a world-famous chef. Good luck, right?

That’s why on Sunday, guest judge Chef Susan Feniger of Ciudad in Los Angeles (and co-host with Mary Sue Milliken of Food Network classic Too Hot Tamales) was “impressed with the calmness of many of them.” Keyword many. Herb had a tough time, still recovering no doubt, and Serena and Paul stumbled while Aarti and Brianna sparkled. (Check out some caught-in-the-act pictures.)

Guest judge Eric Greenspan of The Foundry on Melrose and sometime Food Networker, said, alluding to his own experience on last year’s Next Iron Chef, “One of the greatest things about these shows is everyone is working from their own perspective.” After the challenge, Chef Jonathan Waxman of Barbuto, kind of a cook’s Obi-Wan Kenobi (he says) and a mentor to Bobby Flay, offered advice to the finalists. Note to producers: This would’ve helped the finalists, uh, beforehand. “Make it simple,” Waxman said. “It’s harder to edit yourself than to add.” Standing next to Waxman and introducing him as an inspiration, Bobby needed a little editing–see for yourself.

See the Judges’ Real Reactions Now

DAS. I’m not exactly sure what to say about his elimination – other than for the judges, he clearly lost his dazzle. For me, I was never all that taken with Mr. Smith. He seemed like a nice dude and someone you’d totally want to hang with, but for this competition, I just wasn’t wowed. The one thing about DAS that will stand out to me? He always looked so tired. Now, I can relate, these days so do I, but for TV, looking like you’re on cold medication just isn’t going to work. So long, DAS. Go get some rest.

Let me speak a bit about Herb. Like me, he’s from Atlanta, and I absolutely hate to speak ill of one of my own. But, Herb! All that crying and sobbing was a bit much. We all have our sad stories and we all have times when our emotions get the best of us. But, this week, Herb was letting it all hang out and this wasn’t the place or time. He was so emotional that at one point he made Susie tear up. Yes, I understand he misses his family – however, you know what you’re getting yourself in to when you sign up for this competition. Herb, calm yourself down, wipe those tears away and get your head back in the game. You’re representing the ATL – so, represent!

As for Tom, he was on fire this week! I enjoy watching him come alive in front of the camera. He seems like he is quick on his feet and very witty – two qualities that I believe will serve him well. And, he and his big hair seem to be having genuine fun (or, either he’s faking it very well). My girl, Brianna, won the competition to have a recipe featured on Bobby Flay’s Mesa Grill menu (Chile Chicken Skewers). That is a huge honor! I’ve been a Brianna fan since day one, so I must admit, I loved seeing her win this challenge.

That’s my quick take on Episode 4. Tag, you’re it!

WWBD? It’s easier to be behind the camera than in front of it. And armchair quarterbacking a demo is more fun than doing one: I would’ve, he could’ve, she should’ve.

Even Bobby Flay knows the lens is a tough judge. So he’s sharing his tips this season, making over finalists’ recipes. This week, Bobby is pierside in Santa Monica, dishing out uncommonly sensible advice: Tom‘s fish taco churros could’ve benefited from citrus–yes, Grant, I too would be happy to discus Tom’s  ‘do. Then Bobby takes on Paul’s dish; he could’ve kicked it with a savory dish truly inspired by caramel corn (hint: focus, Paul, honey). 

See what might have been