Winner-to-Winner: Melissa’s Insight

by in Food Network Star, August 18, 2011

Jeff Mauro's winning moment

Melissa d'Arabian won Star season 5 and has been loving her Food Network adventure ever since. You can catch new episodes of her show, Ten Dollar Dinners on Sunday mornings at 9am/8c. As a Star veteran watching from her couch at home, Melissa shares her insider's take on what went down each week.

Congratulations, Jeff, on the big win!

I’ve spent the past couple of months sharing some of my BTDT (been there done that) advice with the finalists.  Last week, I talked about the art of losing.

Now, for the winner, here are some insights I’d like to share about your new world:

1. The old adage is true: Believe neither the good nor bad press. Believe your gut. Trust what you see when you look at yourself in the mirror each morning, and what you see in the eyes of your family.

2. Don’t completely ignore the word on the street, though. If a handful of random Internet posters call my toddler ugly (oh, it has happened), I ignore it. (Side note: Stop Googling yourself!). But if a bunch of folks suggest that a recipe is too salty, well, then maybe it’s worth a few minutes to check it out. Without fans, you don’t have a show, so listen to them. Maybe they see something you don’t.

3. Take the time to make each fan enjoy their moment meeting you. Yes, you will meet many fans, but for each one of them, this is probably the only time they will meet you. I learned this when I, as a fan, met Bobby Flay for the first time (long before I met him on FNS). I’ll never forget how he took the time to pose for a photo with me and my (cranky) daughter. (FYI, Bobby is one of the hardest-working guys in the business, and he never, ever phones it in.) So, my own small but practical tip: When a fan wants to take a picture with you, take five seconds if possible to ask if the photo came out. What a bummer for a fan to have finally met his or her favorite Food Network star, only to discover the photographic evidence is totally blurry.

4. The talent eats first for a reason, so don’t let it go to your head. I learned this on a commercial shoot when the producer insisted that I cut ahead of the crew to the front of the lunch line. Thinking I was being polite, I went to the end of the line. The producer patiently explained she needed me to eat first so that I could get back into makeup for touchups and keep the shoot on schedule. This is a tiny example of the many perks that will come your way being a TV personality. So remember that special treatment is usually for production reasons. Keeping the talent well-fed and juiced with a latte when needed, for instance, is just a smart investment, given the costs of production and overtime. That’s easy to forget when the tiniest yawn from you results in a production assistant racing down the block for a double macchiato with extra foam before you’ve even thought to ask for it. When you are inclined to feel entitled, remind yourself that your special treatment is a business decision, not an acknowledgement of superior status.

Jeff Mauro's winning moment

5. Know how to say no. Remember your life mission and keep that front and center. It’s tempting to say yes to every single thing that crosses your path — there will always be many worthwhile activities, events and causes. I remind myself that I have to tell my kids that I won’t be able to tuck them in at night whenever I say yes. I’ve learned only to say yes to requests that fit into my life mission. Only then is it worth missing my goodnight hugs and kisses with my precious family.

6. Knowing how to say no doesn’t mean you (and your family) won’t have to make some sacrifices. I miss things. How can I not when my job is primarily in New York and my family is in San Diego? But I am crazy-proactive about my schedule, and about creating normal family time with my daughters. However, here is the important part: I want to raise young women who know it’s OK to say “no,” that it’s OK to disappoint responsibly. Who I am in front of my girls teaches them more than what I say, in my opinion. My family will always come before my job, but that doesn’t mean I haven’t had to nurse a tear or two on my way out to the airport.

7. Stay the same behind closed doors. Two years later, my husband still will randomly say, “Can you believe you WON?” We are the same goofy family we were before. And when all four girls are racing around the house playing “chase the princess” (and they are all four the princess; it’s a complex game with many levels), Philippe and I just look at each other as if to say “how did this happen to us?” As my daughter Valentine says to me, “We are a very lucky family, Mommy, aren’t we?” Yes, we are. And it has nothing to do with having my dream job.

Readers, it has been a tremendous pleasure connecting with you every week during this season of Star. Jeff, I can't wait to work with you! And in case you are wondering, Jeff and I will indeed be working together soon, at the New York City Wine and Food Festival (along with Aarti!), so be sure to come say hi to us all.

See what Melissa’s cooking up on Ten Dollar Dinners, check out her Facebook Fan Page and follow her on Twitter (@melissadarabian).

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Comments (58)

  1. steve says:

    Melissa, thank you so much for all of that. This is the actual Jeff Mauro and I gotta say, I'm sitting here reading this with my wife Sarah, Lorenzo is still asleep in his room (thank god) and we couldn't agree with you more. I'll privately message you after this, but I just wanted to let all the fans know, that If in two you years I have both a career and family of your caliber...I'll be a happy man. See you in NYC!

    • Jeff Mauro says:

      @steve...that really is me...Jeff Mauro. BTW

      • Grandma Joyce says:

        My family and I loved your humor we were allowed to see on the reunion show, we were all laughing out loud. Laughter and good food are great things in these difficult times. I admired the kindness you shared with all of your "teammates". Can't wait to see your show, Jeff.

  2. guesthappy says:

    Melissa, a wonderful article with lots of good information and advice! Best of luck, Jeff--you should do well with folks like Melissa on your side!

  3. LindaSta says:

    Melissa, as usual, you nailed it. your comments on choosing between worthy causes. Listening to constructive criticism (too much or too little salt), and understanding the REAL reason for 'special' treatment are SO to the point. I hope Jeff and any other lucky winners past, present or future heed those words. I know that many people know those things, but it doesn't hurt to be reminded by someone who lives the life.
    I wish you many MANY more seasons and a chance to expand your horizons beyond the $10 limit. I love the present show but i know you can do a lot more than budget cooking.

  4. Anne says:

    Melissa, I am and have always been a fan of yours. Jumped for joy when you won a couple of years ago. I was voting for you the whole way....just as I was rooting and voting for Jeff from the first FNS episode.
    I just wish your show was not on Sunday morning, as Aarti's is also. I am in church on Sun morning and do not like taping as well as live. I'll keep hoping they'll give y'all a better time slot soon.
    You have taught me many things. Thanks for that......

    • Guest says:

      If they can't give them a better time slot, maybe they could re-run their shows on a different day and time like they do Rachel & Paula's.

  5. JimmyJack says:

    Melissa, you're a class act.

  6. DIANE says:

    CONGRATULATIONS JEFF MAURO IN WINNING THE COMPETITION. YOU WERE MY FAVORITE PICK VERY EARLY IN THE GAME AND AFTER WATCHING YOUR FIRST FOOD NETWORK SHOW TODAY (SUNDAY, AUG 21ST AT 11:30AM) I WASNT WRONG. YOU ARE UP THERE WITH THE GREAT CHEFS ALREADY IN MY BOOK. YOUR PERSONALITY AND HUMOR ARE GREAT ON CAMERA AND THE WAY YOU COOK AND PRESENT YOUR DISHES IS REMARKABLE FOR JUST STARTING OUT ON TV. I HAVE BEEN A FAN WITH FOOD NETWORK STAR FROM THE BEGINNING AND BESIDES GUY FIERI WHO I ALSO PICKED FROM DAY ONE, YOU ARE ONE MY VERY FAVORITES AND HOPE YOU CONTINUE DOING GREAT FOR YOURSELF. KEEP THEM DELICIOUS SANDWICHES COMING AND I'M GOING TO TRY THEM ALL. VERY EXCITED FOR YOU! THANKS FOR BEING YOU......

  7. Laurie says:

    Melissa. I watch your show but there is no way you have $10 dinners. You add many ingredients that most fams don't have. You have been hard to watch and I don't think you should have won. But you did, and you are getting better. In beginning you were so stiff and methodical. Now you are more relaxed. Just wish you would change your concept to more economical type of recipies rather than $10 meals. A true $10 meal would be shopping for meal and being at $10. 5 Ingredient fix has it right on.

  8. Audrey says:

    I had no idea who would win their own show this season.
    I watched Jeff, The Sandwich King today and you made the absolute best choice, and his show was a joy to watch.
    I have been cooking (mostly Italian food) for 60 years, and and I find myself relating to Jeff's food more than I have ever related to other chef's preparation.
    Jeff Mauro did such a great job and I wish him success now and in the future.

  9. dragonfly29 says:

    not surprised jeff won, i mean look at the guy, i think the network was looking for someone to have the kind of Bobby Flay/ Tyler Florence appeal that would bring in more women viewers, while i was a big Vic fan in the beginning, it seemed early on the panel was pretty much favoring Jeff, not all that impressed with his first show however, give that guy a better kitchen will ya? that green color is awful!! i hope Vic & Susie will find their niche soon, they were both great.

  10. dragonfly29 says:

    Melissa, i find it appaling anyone would say your child is ugly! what in the world is wrong with people? i think you do a fabulous job, i have followed the program since the beginning and the only time i did not pick the winner was when Ms Paarti won, i had picked someone else, there is no place on here for people to be rude, so please try to be kind.